It's been three weeks,
And yes, I haven't seen Axel for a long time.
I want to hold his hands and sleep in her arms.
I want him beside me right now.
I am the most annoying woman in the world for Axel right now.
I keep asking him, "When will you come home?" again and again.
"Soon", Axel always replies me the same answer every time I ask.
Yet sometimes I want another answer, more than that.
I haven't told Axel about my situation lately.
I lost my appetite for the last few weeks.
I didn't grab my breakfast ever since.
I don't feel like eating.
My assistant forced me to eat my breakfast this morning.
And yes, it ended really bad.
I threw up.
I want my Axel here right now.
Axel sent me his photo with Sebastien this morning after I threw up.
He looked good, no, he always looks good.
He has been working really hard for us.
Yes, I am a proud wife.
But it hurts.
It hurts to see yourself in the mirror.
It hurts to wake up every morning without someone you really love.
It hurts to be separated by the time and the distance.
Axel always called when he finished his work.
"The show was great, 10.000 people came to watched", he said.
I am glad, I am happy.
But to be happy, is not easy.
He called me 2 hours ago,
He told me that he was on his way to airport,
He will go to Sydney, Australia then he will go to Adelaide.
And the drama started.
I began to cry when he said that he'll be home in two weeks.
I told him that I want him now, I want to be in his arms right now.
Axel paused quite a while, and said,
"Don't make me want to quit my job because I've been missing you so much since the day I left you at the airport".
Axel calmed me down.
He always knows how to do it.
Those words means a lot to me.
And he said,
"Do you know the feeling when you wake up and your wife isn't there? It kills me. I did, I had fun with my friends, had fun with the crowd, I ate lots of delicious food, I drank a lot and I drunk, I felt this awesome vibe when I was going to start something or when I was working for the last minute edit for my setlist. I've been working for some remixes and a new song, I told you a few days ago. But when it comes to you, every time I see your photo in my phone, every time you text me that you love me so much and you miss me, all I want to do is pack my things, then take the fastest plane, and go home for you".
We were talking for almost an hour,
When he said that he had just arrived at the airport.
Yes, we had to ended this conversation.
Axel paused for ten seconds and said,
"I'll be home very soon, my dear. I know it's hard for you to accept this, but I know that you will understand. This is not just about my career, but it's about us and our future. You are a very tough girl, and no one in this world could replace your place in my life. You were there in my bad times, you pulled me out from there. You deserve to be with me in my good times, and I will pull you out from this condition. Keep up with me until the end because we deserve to be happy. Keep on loving me, because I will keep on loving you for being a wonderful wife".
I cried harder than before.
I knew that he was tired because he only slept for two hours,
But he convinced me to not to give up on him, on us.
We can do it, we will survive.
"Nothing but love for you, dear", said Axel before we ended the call.
I miss my Axel now more than ever.
And suddenly, my assistant opens my bedroom door and walks in.
She forces me to see the doctor as soon as possible, the ob/gyn ones.
