Thunderstorm.

I Can't.

When A Swan Fell In Love With An Eagle.

There's something I can't say about you.

How your eyes see the world,

How you shines,

There are hundred things I can not see.

I can't read you.

I won't read you.

I am not afraid,

You're just 2000 light years away from me.

I want to reach you someday.

I want to see your happiness breaks upon me.

I want to see how far you can handle us.

Will you trust me?

You are my teacher, a strong one.

You're someone who can handle me at my worst.

You remind me, you rewind, and you remember it.

You care.

You keep your head high,

You keep your mind off the ground, to the sky.

You blended with my colors,

You, are you to be proud of.

When our eyes met in the deep sea,

I knew that I almost there,

In a place where I could share my stories all day long.

You are not a ghost in disguise.

We walk together through the risk, aren't we?

You have no back-up plan and gently, you started this.

You put yourself before me.

You're not giving up on me.

Dearly beloved,

I can feel you even with my eyes closed.

Turn your head, look at me.

You're the most beautiful dawn in January.

My Heaven Lies In You.

Poems and visions.

Songs and memories.

Ocean and mountains.

Blue and green.

Heartbeats and tears.

Raindrops and thunders.

Red cheeks and warm bodies.

Happiness and sadness.

Bring me back to life.

Wake me up.

Save me and take me home.

I want to see your eyes one more time.

I need you,

And you need me.

I can't go.

I can't see you from here.

Who's going to handle you when I am not around?

Who's going to calm you down when nobody can do it?

Who's going to wipe your tears when you miss someone?

Who's going to protect you when I am so far away from you?

Don't give up on me.

Find me, find a away to find me.

I am here, yes, I am here, darling.

Look at me, reach me, reach my hand.

I love you.

Don't go too far.

I will keep my eyes wide open.

For you, I will survive.

If only I can show you what I have been seeing,

If only I can lend these eyes for you,

You will see the most beautiful color,

Bursting out from your body.

Don't let go.

Don't go.

I want to live with you,

And make the euphoria of our happiness explodes into a thousand bright colors.

Let me live in your arms, forever.

Lucy In the Sky With Diamonds.

Hello, this is Lucy.

Lucy has something to say.

Lucy wrote it down on a paper.

Lucy named it, "Lucy's Letter".

Jakob,

Why are you here?

Such a coincidence, isn't it?

It's been months we haven't had a nice quality time like this.

You're such a hero.

Too wise to let go,

Too hard to not to talk to.

You bring happiness when you're beside me.

I made you a golden throne.

To show you that you're a different kind.

Why?

Because you believe that your belief is real.

You know what I need.

You know what I want.

You know what I like.

You put yourself before me.

When I needed air, you gave me wind.

When I needed water, you gave me ocean.

When I asked you to bring me a flower, you took to me to a field full of purple asters.

And when I am scared of myself, you calmed me down and gave me words to move on.

You taught me how to conquer myself.

You reminded me that there is a way.

You told me to live on.

You helped me to walk away.

A boy who has a thousand views of art for living.

A boy who can control his anger and settle differences without destroying himself.

The one who keeps his strength as a key for his life.

A lovely man to share your happiness and to grow old with.

Jakob,

You are my brother, my father, my best-friend  my savior, my right eyes and the voices inside my head.

Keep on telling me stories.

Be the one I can be proud of and count on.

I won't lose you out of sight.

My eyes are watching yours.

Don't let me down,

Because you won't let myself down.

Thank you!

Keep on singing my song.

Stay here, as the wind in my Neverland.

I hope you'll be good out there.

With my eyes closed for missing someone,

Love, Hugs and Kisses,

Little Lucy.

Don't You Worry, Anggia.

I know that those days are gone,

And my eyes aren't begging for your existence anymore.

But I still remember how it all changed.

It was hurt.

Remind me,

That we are not in the same dimension anymore.

Remind me,

That we are not seeing the same sun anymore.

I held you close,

But you let me go.

I wiped your tears,

But you torn my heart in two.

My heart is not your home anymore.

We do not share the same dream anymore.

I belong to another hands.

So do you.

There was a time,

When we cried ourselves to sleep,

Just because we were missing each other.

Such a memory, such a dream.

And now I am fully awake.

I am stronger than you will ever know.

I will reach the horizon alone,

And please, don't ever try to reach me.

Because you are already dead,
here, in my memories.

Cold-Blooded Killer In the Mind of Eros.

I am fine.

I am okay.

You don't have to ask.

All you need is to come here and sit with me.

You're my favorite color.
Your color blends with my skin, my eyes.

And your voice, my elegy, my song.

I just love to see you.

But you're tearing me apart inside.
You're bringing me somewhere down the line.

You don't feel what I'm feeling right now.

You don't see the color I'm seeing right now.

One day,
When you turn your attention to another person,

You will leave.

Your eyes will be unfamiliar for me.

But I am glad,
To know that you will find someone.

I am glad,

You're in love again after a thousand heart-breaking moments from your past.

The healing power of tears and laughter will serve me well.
Another man will revive me from the dead.

I will walk away,

In denial.

Now, let me ask.
How could I mend my broken heart,

Without questioning myself how do you do,

Without pretending that I don't know you?

Without loving you from a distance?

Thank You Alesso, Sebastian Ingrosso and Ryan Tedder For "Calling (Lose My Mind)".

Let the rain falls down.
Let the raindrops hit our faces.

Lose your mind and jump as high as you can.

Feel the beat and act crazy.

You will find me.

I will find you.

You will reach me.

I will reach you.

Don't stop.

Keep on moving to the beat.

Hold my hands.

The world is spinning for us.

We don't need gravity.

Are you cold?

Here's my arms, hold onto it.

Fall for me.

Close your eyes.

We are in heaven of our imagination.

Feel the rain, let the raindrops washes your pain away.

Share your happiness, let me feel it.

Fuck those voices inside your head.
Think of me, of us.

The rain won't stop for us.

Because your body keeps on dancing like crazy.

Smile, and everybody's watching.
Watch me and I'll watch you.

Cry, feel the music and let it through.

We are lighter than air.

Shit, I love you. I swear I love you so much.

Ten Minutes Running.

Teruntuk kamu,

Yang tidak tahu diri.

Yang seenaknya datang dan pergi.

Kumohon, cukup.

Aku biarkan kamu untuk singgah di balik kehancuranku.

Dan aku menerimamu dengan tangan terbuka.

Tapi kenapa aku harus berjalan bersamamu dan kebohonganmu?

Kumohon, cukup.

Aku tidak dibuat untuk direlakan.

Aku hadir tapi tidak untuk ditinggalkan.

Aku berdiri untuk medampingi kamu.

Aku berdiri untuk melengkapi bagian hidupmu yang hilang.

Kamu bisa bayangkan,

Betapa pedihnya aku ketika aku diharuskan untuk bernafas di sampingmu.

Lihat aku.

Sadarkah kamu? Kedua mataku hancur karena terlalu banyak mengeluarkan air mata?

Aku mau bahagia sama kamu.

Kita bisa tembus kebahagiaan itu.

Tapi kamu tidak sadari itu karena kedua matamu ditutup oleh kenyataan.

Jadi, untuk apa aku datang dan bertemu dengan kamu?

Kumohon, pergilah.

Pergi jauh, hingga aku tidak dapat menggapaimu.

Aku akan membuat diriku seperti sedang bermimpi.

Lalu terbangun dan menyadari bahwa aku tidak pernah mengenalmu.

If you love me, you will breathe my name.

But if you are not, you will walk away forever.

When My Idealism Gets High.

You knocked my door and ran away.

You pushed me to move out.

But you pulled me closer.

What happened to us?

It was me all along.

My idealism slapped my face.

No,

My idealism has been attacking me until today.

How could I lose it for myself?

For us?

The only way to do it is to love you with what you have.

For what you are.

But I want it this way, not that way.

But I know if I force myself to walk my life in a perfect life,

I won't get what I want.

So I have to let you in and let myself learn a bunch of things from you.

But I am scared.

Scared of what will happen next.

Scared of welcoming new people.

I am scared of lonely.

I have been hurt twice last year.

The condition makes me afraid to move forward.

I am afraid to love, to be loved, to wish and to be wished for.

But I won't let it happen again for myself.

I hope I will find someone,

Who understands me so well without asking,

Who realizes what I need without saying,

Who serves me what I deserve.

When the clock ticks my life away,

That means I am ready for what I will receive.

And if it was you, the one that God has been planning for,

Then I promise you and myself that I will take a good care of you for the rest of my life.

You Will Never Make It Through the Rain Without Me By Your Side.

Thank you,

For disturbing my eyes.

Thank you,

For being such a nice person.

Thank you,

For being here and everywhere.

Thank you,

For giving me a bunch of questions.

Why are you here?

Why did you say hi?

Why did you always check up on me?

Why do you do this?

You are my one of my favorites.

You knew how to tame me.

You're such a good man.

But why did you leave me hanging?

I pour half of my heart for you.

I let you live in my head.

Do you let me to live in yours?

Or am I just an old broken doll for you?

I let you know my life.

Half of it.

Why don't you let me?

Let me know and I'll be there standing next to you.

I know our world is different.

Too different.

But I feel warm by your existance.

I feel good.

Now, let me see with my own eyes.

Are you a good man or 'a-good-man-for-now'?

Prove me then I will reach you.

Prove me then I will hold you.

"If you are down with someone, doesn't mean that you have to own them for life"

Such a deadly weapon your words are.

Now I close my eyes and start to dream.

We'll meet there if you have the same dream like mine.

Sir,

Don't start what you can't finish.

I Am Not A Soldier With A Heart Made ​​of Wood.

Don't ever think,

That I don't know the truth.

I know your life,

And I know your position.

Okay, fine.

I don't know you.

But I searched the truth.

And I didn't like what I found.

Please.

Don't make me want you.

Don't make me think that you're the one for me.

Don't make feel comfortable with you.

Your words are not going to kill me.

My brain is working.

Don't make me feel like I am the one you've been searching for.

Because I am not.

I know you but I don't know your world.

Your taste, your favorite things.

Let her satisfies you with what she has.

With what she has done to your life.

I am nobody.

I'm just a new person here.

The truth I found in you makes me say, "Fuck it."

So, don't make me turn that shit into a "Fuck You."

So here you are.

Don't be such a denial person.

You're too old for that.

And I'm too old to watch.

When We Meet In the Northern Sky.

Floor made of wood and a room shades of gray.

Fluffy pillows and blanket.

Photographs and slow music.

Your favorite things hanged above your bed.

You loved to hug me when we went off to take a nap.

You waited me until I fell asleep.

You kissed my forehead like I am your favorite doll.

You whispered 'I love you' over and over again.

Remember when we sit separately in a room and you were talking to your friend,

You called me to came to you,

Then you kissed my cheeks and told me to return to where I sit.

You knew what I want and what I need.

You knew that we rarely had time together because we often spent our time with our friends.

So when we were on our way to Safari Park,

You took the left lane and said,

"Good for us, isn't it? So we can share things about us and nobody will disturb"

Years go by.

You've changed a lot.

But it is still you.

Still my rainy day.

It hurt,

When we were in the car after you picked me up and I drove your car,

You said, "I don't live to be yours, but as the best man at a time when you're happy or when you're down"

It hurt, I swear.

And when you said,

"You want me to be your husband? Are you sure that you want to have a husband who can't be your leader in marriage and religion?"

Just because of those tattoos on your body.

It hurt.

And when the last time you visited me.

Hell, I've been missing those eyes of yours.

Your smile and the way you look at me.

Perfect.

But I am sorry.

It's all over.

But I promise I will keep you in me forever.

So there won't be another goodbye.

Now you understand.

Look at me.

It wasn't him who broke my heart with these fond memories.

It was you all along.

Sweet Nothing.

I wasn’t upset.
I'm away from anger.
I'm hiding the feelings I have within.
I am sorry.

I believe in myself.
I stay true to what I deserve as an independent woman.
I didn't lock myself into a box just like back then.
I deserve what you never gave and what you could never give.

I remember when you left for your flight.
I remember when you told me that you'll see me soon.
And all I wanted is your very arrival to come back to me safely.
Like you promised me every night before we closed our eyes to sleep.

And there was a time when everything was wrong.
But time heals everything.
Letting myself down will never work.
That’s when I realized that I am the one who can save myself.

You woke up those seven deadly sins in you.
The richness we had found is lost.
Nothing is forever, this will not last.
So I left you not because I didn't love you.

If only I had the time,
I would pray the time to stand still.
Because there are still few words left unspoken.
For you I lied so you can walk in your own path.

Now I see.
That people go through with life, but never seem to fully come alive.
Life is a long story so you better take a comfortable seat.
But when it ends, won’t they be surprised?

You should stop and think about others.

Moment to moment...
Seconds to minutes...
Minutes to hours...


And you will notice one thing.
You survived.

Hummingbird's Elegy

02:00 AM, I'm wide awake.

Listening to an instrumental song called 'Vienna' by The Fray.

A pure sound of a piano,

And memories.

I never say goodbye to everything I had before this.

I hold them through these days.

Until they dry out from my hands.

But still, they never leave.

It hurts to know that they are here.

Alive, and agleam.

I can see their smiles so clearly.

I can feel how they hurt me that day.

I love you, you, and you.

All of you.

Those scars remain here in my chest forever.

Those warm bodies stay in my head.

But you, only you.

The one who tore my heart in two.

I don't want you here.

Let me go.

I'm running in pain.

I'm running in vain.

Because you run after me.

You find me and you won't let me walk alone.

I can't erase you.

Though you hurt me everytime I close my eyes.

Because the memory of you lingers forever.

Because you love me until now.

There is no way to reach me.

Because I'm already gone.

But this is not my goodbye.

This is my hello.

Too complicated to write about it here.

Nobody will understand.

But who cares?

I'm the one who takes this over.

Perhaps in three or five years,

Yours and mine will meet again.

I gave you time and this distance.

Let me take it back.

I am not your enemy.

No, we aren't.

I'm a woman and you're a man with these walls we built.

With these barriers we built.

Do as you please.

Love yourself.

Remember, I won't erase you.

You and the rest stay forever.

If tears could wash my pain away.

I would cry everyday.

Now, go.

But don't turn your back on me.

How Lucky You Are To Have Someone To Miss.

Atala

"Please, let me live"

Deva

"I don't want to hurt you"

Atala

"Give me another chance to take a good care of yours"

Deva

"Not now. But someday you will"

Atala

"Please don't wipe these tears"

Deva

"Your tears belong to me"

Atala

"Please don't leave me"

Deva

"I never left"

Deva

"Let me fix you"

Atala

"Hold me"

Deva

"I hope you're happy with your life now"

Atala

"I hope you're happy with your life now and forever"

Deva

"Don't give up on me"

Atala

"I'm saving my best for last"

Deva

"Come back for me"

Atala

"These eyes are missing yours already"

See?

You don't have to be afraid if you have to count the stars alone.

Because your body is always with you wherever you go.

So does the memories inside you.

He stays.

She stays.

Stop being denial to each other.

You are one.

A Soulful Conscience of A Hungry Female Wolf.

Hello, Damian.

It's been a very long time since we separated by your ego.

I know you are settled now.

You found someone, she replaced my place.

I don't miss you.

I don't miss our time when we were together.

But I have a bunch of questions.

And you don't have to answer.

What will you do,

When we meet one day,

You and I are alone, and we know that we had something in the past,

Will you leave your stubbornness behind?

Will you ask? And how will you ask?

Will you say hi?

Will you leave your selfishness for a day?

Will you realize? Will you look back?

Will you start all over again?

Or perhaps you will rewind the pain?

Will you brave you eyes to look into mine?

Will you look at me like the day you laid your eyes on me?

Will you dream the same dream like we used to? 

Will you stay?

Or perhaps you will run and hide yourself from me?

Will you try to convince yourself that I am the one you've been waiting and searching for?

Will you?

I am so far away from you.

I am so far away from reality.

We are playing with our mind.

We are lost. We are heartless.

But, we are still love each other.

The memories of me blend with your life.

My kiss goodnight, my kiss goodbye.

I live behind those heartless eyes of yours.

Always.

If only I can be with you right now,

I would make you warm with the love I give to you.

If only you would stay a little longer and be more patient,

We'll have our dreams come true now.

If only,

My ego could win you over.

If only,

Your ego could lose for my existence in your life.

What if,

Your heart beats my name tomorrow?

What if,

In your anger, you want me there to calm you down the day after tomorrow?

But I don't wish for that.

I wish you a great happiness for your life.

For a bright future, and a lovely woman who can handle you in her own way.

For your family you will build one day and for your career.

4:25 AM,

I look to myself in the mirror.

I smile.

And I say to myself, "One day, you and I will meet and let God do the rest".

Good morning, Damian.

Have a safe flight.

With joy and freedom,

Anissa Sadino.