Another concrete wall to make.
It's not about my reputation,
But it's all about the aching heart.
The feelings that hurt,
The emotions that stings,
The longing for impossible things,
The desire and the world’s existence,
Not everything's perfect,
Especially in the beginning.
I ran out in the woods,
And I began to cry.
Those regrets become part of who I am,
Along with everything else.
I've been spending my time trying to change that,
But it's like swimming in the flood.
There are no reasons about what happened back then.
It happened like that, period.
I've been given a second chance to start my life over,
And I threw that opportunity away.
At least I tried.
I tried to be honest with myself.
I tried to stay calm,
Yet it was pointless.
If only I could grieve endlessly for the loss of time and for the damage I made,
If only I could carry my scars with me,
If only I could trade all those memories for a brand new life,
God, I think too much.
I found myself remembering how on one night,
I started from nowhere in search of happiness.
It was good... Really good.
It's 02:34 now.
I won't recall,
I won't close my eyes.
I will let my eyes burn to ashes.